Pepping Myself Up

Body image is a tough issue for lots of post-baby moms. I'm having a particularly tough time with it post-baby #3. About eight years ago, I started Weight Watchers and lost 30 pounds, and that's just about the amount I gain when I'm pregnant. So, I've gained and lost 30 pounds several times in the last few years. I haven't gotten back to my goal weight since before getting pregnant with Celia, but I've been close, like within 5 pounds. But man, now that I've got three kiddos, finding the time to exercise and finding the discipline to eat right has been REALLY HARD! My fantastic sister Beth has helped motivate me to exercise and we've both been doing the Thirty Day Shred for a while now. But somehow, while she's lost five pounds doing the DVD and detoxing, eating only really healthy things, I've managed to take off nothing, go on a cruise, eat whatever I want, get post-cruise vertigo, use that as an excuse to continue eating cookies, and be full of regret and remorse that I'm wearing a size that I'm unhappy about.

I'm not just blogging about this to whine, although getting it out of my system is theraputic and helpful. My hope is that I'll motivate myself through writing about it, and by making it public, maybe I'll get my wide rear in gear! No more excuses! The kids are not slowing me down from losing weight. They're there to help actually. I'm constantly in motion doing something for one of them. They are the biggest supporters of me doing my Thirty Day Shred. Celia and Mikey jump right in front of the T.V. and jump around with me. Celia calls me out when I'm cheating and not doing the moves right. Mikey gets on my back when I do push ups, trying to increase my metabolism. Xavier even tries to add an extra challenge by spitting up in the middle of my jumping jacks, so I have to run to him, wipe his face, and keep on moving. Thank you, Collazlings, thank you for caring. Also, if I'm really being a loving and nurturing mother, I'll set the example of what healthy eating looks like and feed them similarly. I bet they'd enjoy cooking dinner with me just about as much as baking brownies. It's time to start a new routine. As my old Weight Watcher's leader used to say, "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten." Time to shake it up!

And Beth rocks my socks! She has agreed to watch the fiesta trio every Wednesday morning starting this week so that I can go to my Weight Watchers meetings. Apparently, I really need that accountability. If a stranger isn't writing down my weight each week, I just don't stay on track. It's kind of like going to confession. You go and face the music, get some advice, and start fresh each time.

I know how it's done. I can do it. I've done it repeatedly before. And it feels SO AMAZING to look in the mirror and like what I see. Oh to feel my hip bones again! To get back into the scores of cute single-digit-sized pants hanging in my closet! To be able to do the crazy jump moves in level 3 of that DVD and not feel my belly jiggle for 10 minutes afterwards! It's so totally worth it. I'm worth it. My kids deserve to have a mommy who feels good about how she looks and who is strong and healthy.

And just one more thought on this whole body image thing...my extra rolls and jiggles and even the stretch marks are beautiful, too, because they are the result of bringing three of the most amazing kids ever born into the world. But I've got the amazing product that this amazing body has issued forth. I'm ready to enjoy them and myself again. I can do it. I will do it. Here I go!